Random Thoughts Out of Order

“You still haven’t learned to cooperate, have you?”

“I’m learning how to cooperate. I just don’t want to cooperate with you!”

That was my conversation with the police officer who knocked on my door and didn’t identify himself properly. He told me to come out on the porch and, “Stand right there.” Pointing at a specific spot on the ground.

“Who are you?” I asked. And it should be noted that I don’t like to be told what to do by anyone, let alone a man who has not identified himself to me.

What did he want? He wanted to know if a certain person was at my house because he had heard from a person who had heard from another person that had caught wind from someone’s lonely old grandmother who thought a bird told her that this person would be at my house.

Why don’t I respond well to situations like these? Well, it all started in the sixth grade when I was playing on the playground… Or, how about I’ve seen so many instances in the news that I’m becoming more and more genuinely concerned as a lawful citizen that… No, it’s actually because it’s in the Constitution for one. Officers think they can just push people around for two. And I missed class the day they taught everyone to bend over and take that situation.

Upon identifying himself and listening intently to my thoughtful concerns, note that at no time did I stand where he had directed me, the officer was shown my apartment and completed an entire walk-through to his satisfaction. I was home alone trying to get some work accomplished.

“Sorry for the inconvenience.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Checking my mail as if to say, “Whatever. Go away. Get the facts straight next time. And this is one of those times when I get to treat you like a moron rather than the other way around.”

“You still haven’t learned to cooperate, have you?”

“I’m learning how to cooperate. I just don’t want to cooperate with you!”

That was what I said to the State’s Attorney who thought I was her key witness. She soon found out wrong when she asked me about what I had witnessed.

Why were we having this conversation? Because my friend had been charged with assault of a male who had worn out his welcome for the last time.

Why was I being asked to testify against my friend? Because they thought I had witnessed the whole thing.

“No ma’am. I was in my apartment taking care of my daughter. When I finally did arrive on the scene, the guy was already down. Someone had already called for the ambulance.”

“But the police report said you saw it all.”

“Come on lady. You play this game every day. You are on the inside loop of what’s going on around here. You still believe what the police tell you? I guess if it’s what you want to hear, huh?”

“You still haven’t learned to cooperate, have you?”

“I’m learning how to cooperate. I just don’t want to cooperate with you!”

That was what I was thinking the day that judge ran into a ditch and tore a stop sign out of the ground. I naturally approached the car as a concerned citizen. But, he was fine. It was obvious that he had been drinking and was feeling no pain. I figured he had a cellphone and would use it to call a tow truck.

“You gonna help me or juss stan there an look at it?” Oh how ironic it was that this guy is the same guy who hammers people for drinking and driving.

“I can’t help you with that. You’re sitting in a ditch. Call a tow truck.”

“Come awn. We can puss it.”

Ah, for crying out loud. I started rolling up my sleeves. Little did I know that I would be doing all the work. Then came the hard part. Do I ask if he can call his wife to come get him? Do I attempt to tell him that he shouldn’t drink and drive? No. No. None of those things. Just a still small voice asking, “Where do you live?”

“Jes down the street. Why, you wanna ride?”

“No. Just wondering.” Then to myself, “Hope you make it.”

“You still haven’t learned to cooperate, have you?”

“Nah. Not doing so good with that.”

What Are Your Thoughts?